You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
