ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize