yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
