Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
