you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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