So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
