your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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