My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize