A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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