I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
How's work?
Spinning.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
