Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize