i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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