one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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