god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
