On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
