I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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