let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
So much Jack, so little girl.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
