discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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