just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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