I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize