haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Don't EVER smell your tampon
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
