For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
