it's too hot outside to masturbate.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
