This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
