Is it normal to miss your booty call?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
