Don't you send me to vm
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
