bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
