Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
