margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
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