Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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