is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
