just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
