They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
