Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
We left an ass print on the piano.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
