Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
