She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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