I hope mine doesn't look like that
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I AM VODKA MAN
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
