you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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