just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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