worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
