You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
