Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
