Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
