have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
someone owes me an orgasm
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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