Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize