btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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