I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
