I murdered the dance floor call the cops
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I met the friendliest cop last night
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Randomize
