If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
