i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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