bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
